THE SACRAMENT OF HOLY MATRIMONY
Weddings at St. Nectarios
Congratulations on your engagement. We look forward to helping you prepare for the sacred and joyful beginning of your married life in Christ.
Begin Your Marriage in Christ
In the Orthodox Church, marriage is more than a legal agreement or social celebration. It is a Sacrament through which a man and woman are united in a life of mutual love, faithfulness, sacrifice and spiritual growth.
The husband and wife are called to share their Christian lives, support one another and grow closer to God together. Rather than exchanging personal vows, the couple is joined through the prayers and sacramental actions of the Church.
Couples should contact the Parish Office before confirming a date, printing invitations or making nonrefundable arrangements with vendors.
Start Here
Parish Office
(847) 358-5170
office@stnectariosgoc.org
At least three premarital meetings with the parish priest are required. The priest will review date availability, paperwork, sponsor requirements and preparation for the Sacrament.
The Orthodox Marriage Service
The service includes the Betrothal and the Crowning and is rich with prayer, Scripture and symbolism.
The Rings
The rings are blessed and exchanged during the Service of Betrothal, expressing commitment and faithfulness.
The Crowning
The bride and groom are crowned with the stefana, representing joy, honor and self-sacrificial love.
The Common Cup
The couple shares a common cup, symbolizing the blessings, responsibilities and challenges they will share.
Scripture and Prayer
The Epistle and Gospel offer guidance for Christian marriage and recall Christ’s presence at the wedding in Cana.
The Joining of Hands
The priest joins the couple’s hands as a sign that God is uniting them in marriage.
The Dance of Isaiah
The priest leads the couple around the table three times, representing their first steps together with Christ.
Preparing for the Sacrament
Your first step is to contact the Parish Office. A wedding date is not final until it has been approved by the parish priest.
- Contact the parish. Discuss available dates and your individual circumstances.
- Meet with the priest. Complete at least three premarital meetings and review the Orthodox understanding of marriage.
- Complete the paperwork. Obtain the required civil license, ecclesiastical authorization and supporting documents.
- Confirm ceremony arrangements. Review the sponsor, music, photography, guest clergy, flowers and items needed for the service.
General Marriage Requirements
The parish priest will determine the documents and approvals required for each couple. The following overview is provided for planning purposes.
Civil and Ecclesiastical Licenses
A valid civil marriage license and ecclesiastical authorization through the Metropolis are required.
Canonical Eligibility
No legal or canonical impediment may exist, and prior marriages or divorces must be fully disclosed.
Inter-Christian Marriage
A non-Orthodox partner must be a Christian baptized with water in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.
Koumbaros or Koumbara
The sacramental sponsor must be an Orthodox Christian in good standing with a canonical Orthodox parish.
Previous Marriages
Civil documents, death certificates and an ecclesiastical divorce may be required, depending on the circumstances.
Approved Orthodox Clergy
The Sacrament must be celebrated in a canonical Orthodox church by approved canonical Orthodox clergy.
Inter-Christian Marriages
The Orthodox Church may celebrate a marriage between an Orthodox Christian and a non-Orthodox Christian when the non-Orthodox partner has received a Christian baptism with water in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.
The couple should be willing to baptize their children in the Orthodox Church and raise them in the Orthodox Christian faith. The Church cannot celebrate a marriage between an Orthodox Christian and a person who is not a baptized Christian.
Questions about whether a baptism is recognized should be discussed directly with the parish priest.
Choosing a Koumbaros or Koumbara
The sponsor participates in the exchange of the rings and crowns and must be:
- A baptized Orthodox Christian
- A member in good standing of a canonical Orthodox parish
- In full sacramental communion with the Orthodox Church
- Married in the Orthodox Church, when applicable
- In possession of an ecclesiastical divorce, when applicable
Non-Orthodox friends and relatives may participate in the wedding party, but they may not serve as the sacramental sponsor.
Items Needed for the Ceremony
- Wedding rings for the bride and groom
- A set of stefana, or wedding crowns
- Two white wedding candles
The Parish Office will explain how and when these items should be brought to the church.
Days When Weddings Are Not Ordinarily Celebrated
Because the Orthodox liturgical calendar includes seasons of fasting, preparation and major feast days, weddings are not ordinarily celebrated on:
- January 5 and 6
- Great Lent and Holy Week
- Holy Pascha
- Pentecost
- August 1–15
- August 29, the Beheading of St. John the Baptist
- September 14, the Exaltation of the Holy Cross
- December 13–25
Because Great Lent, Pascha and Pentecost move from year to year, all proposed dates must be confirmed with the Parish Office.
Please Confirm Before Booking
An exception may be granted only by the Metropolitan. Parish and clergy availability must also be considered before a date is approved.
Do not print invitations or make nonrefundable arrangements until the date and time have been cleared by the parish priest.
Music, Photography and Other Arrangements
All ceremony arrangements should preserve the prayerful dignity of the Sacrament and be confirmed with the parish in advance.
Photography and Video
Photographers and videographers should speak with the priest before the service and follow all parish directions.
Music
All music and hymns connected with the wedding must be approved by the parish priest in advance.
Flowers and Decorations
Decorations must respect the sacred character of the church and must be coordinated with the Parish Office.
Guest Clergy
A guest Orthodox priest may participate only with the prior approval of the St. Nectarios parish priest.
Ready to Begin?
Contact the St. Nectarios Parish Office before selecting a final wedding date or printing invitations. May God bless your engagement and guide you as you prepare to enter the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony.
